If you’re new here, welcome. It took you long enough. Kidding. Pour yourself a cup of coffee or any beverage of your choice (we don’t judge here, so if it’s a martini you need to make it through the morning, go for it… plus, alcohol makes me funnier!) and hang out for a while.
If you’re coming back to read this page for the 52nd time, you’re kind of stalking me… AND I LOVE IT!
Here’s some stuff to know about me. I tried to come up with 100 (because I know you have all the time in the world and want to spend it reading about me) but I could only come up with 37. They’re mostly true.
- I’ve been married for a bunch of years and we own three kids: girl (age 9), boy (almost 7), boy (age 5). I really wanted a second girl, so my daughter could have a sister, but unfortunately for her, that shop is closed. Like boarded up, went out of business, sold everything at half price, permanently CLOSED.
- On this blog, I refer to my kids as The Loud One (self-explanatory… the girl’s lack of volume control is insane); the Nibbit (origin: calling him Nothing But Trouble -> NBT -> Nibbit); and Happy Dude (because he was such a chill baby… but now this name should really be amended to Happy Dude Except for the Hours Between Midnight and 5:00am).
- The state of our house could easily be described as completely uncontrolled chaos at any given time. There are usually at least two people crying and one of them is usually me. But we also have a lot of fun. And dance parties.
- I have a big, blended, wonderful family, both immediate and extended. We spend so much time together that people that don’t know us well think it’s a bit strange and possibly a bit creepy. People that do know us well think it’s strange and possibly a bit creepy, as well.
- I LOVE Starbucks. I love it enough to warrant #5 on this list. I’m there everyday, sometimes twice a day. I love everything about it except that odd Trenta size. Trenta’s weird. You can read more about my love for SBs right HERE.
- It annoys me when people don’t use the proper sizing terminology in Starbucks. Oh, you’re TOO COOL to say Grande? Or Venti? Just go to Dunkin’ Donuts then, buddy.
- I lost my Mom to cancer years ago and still miss her on an hourly basis. I usually think of her when I need my pants hemmed or information on whether cooking wine is the same as white wine vinegar. (Is it?) I talk about her a lot around here. I hope that doesn’t bum you out.
- I LOVE lists. (I know I already mentioned that, but it bears repeating. I love lists that much. I also love blank notebooks, lined and unlined, Post-It notes (all sizes) and felt tip markers.
- I’m a pretty good doodler. Like if they had a reality TV show called, So You Think You Can Doodle, I would totally win.
- I dislike reality TV. Except for Top Chef, Project Runway, The Voice and So You Think You Can Dance. Other than that, reality TV blows.
- I am a HUGE fan of the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. How? HOW?? I don’t need to understand it to appreciate its magnificence.
- My sister and I talk on the phone about six times a day. If it’s only five times, one of us will inevitably follow up the next morning with, “Why didn’t you call me back last night??”
- I like to sew, but don’t really know how. I made a quilt once. So then I thought I was a hotshot and got a fancy sewing machine for Christmas and bought a bunch of books and fabric and… nothing. But I did make this cool tooth fairy pillow.
- My husband and I dated way back when we were in our early twenties. It was a completely different relationship than the one we have now. We were more mature back then. And we were getting WAY more sleep.
- My favorite part of the day is when my kids run into our room in the morning and give me big hugs. RIIIIIIGHT. Like my favorite part of any day would ever be at 6:00am?? I don’t think so. It’s really when they hug me goodnight right before bed. Actually, it’s when they’re asleep. I could take or leave the hug.
- My favorite movies are Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (the original, OF COURSE; I’ve never watched the stupid Johnny Depp version) and Mary Poppins. I also really like Armageddon and the awesomely cheesy Aerosmith song that goes with it. And all J.Lo movies, obviously. Don’t judge.
- I don’t like suspense of ANY kind (I watch most TV and movies with my hands covering my eyes), so KJ and I can rarely agree on a movie to see. Sometimes we go to the theater together and see two separate movies. Win win.
- I don’t like to cook but I have three dependents that require feeding at least three times a day, so I’m forced to do some type of meal preparation everyday. I’m getting a little bit better I think; I can now make pasta six different ways.
- I do not like hot dogs. I WANT to, but I don’t. Ditto for rice pudding.
- I’m a terrible flyer. And by “terrible,” I mean “100% confident that my plane is destined to crash and burn every single time I fly. And at the sign of the slightest turbulence, I start to cry. A lot.” Bet you want to travel with me now, huh?
- I sort of think that I would be an awesome sky diver because I hate flying so much. I’d be so happy to jump out of the plane… no?
- I drive a minivan and I LOVE it. For real, honest. I wanted a minivan before we had kids, but waited for THREE of them to get one.
- I lived in Greenwich Village for several years before moving to the suburbs. I love my house, but I miss our old apartment there. I am determined to get it back someday. So if you live in my old apartment in The Brevoort, consider yourself warned. Mwah hahaha!
- I have tried drugs. (For the aforementioned flying issue, of course.)
- I used to write a weekly celebrity gossip column for the New York Daily News, mocking all the stories in the weekly gossip magazines. It was silly and fun and they paid me to do it. I stopped writing it when Heath Ledger overdosed and that story was on the cover of every single gossip magazine. I couldn’t think of any jokes about that.
- I’m not as addicted to Us Weekly as I used to be, because once it became my “job” to read it, much of the pleasure disappeared. OK, that’s actually a total lie. I still love Us Weekly. But I’ve matured a bit, so now my true periodical love is… Entertainment Weekly.
- I am not a fan of high heels or couture. I don’t even know how to pronounce couture. I wear mostly yoga pants. From Old Navy. And dark jeans when it’s dress-up time.
- I once wrote an article for Cosmopolitan magazine. They basically rewrote the whole thing and it was awful. I didn’t tell anyone when it came out because I was embarrassed by the way it sounded. Then I got the paycheck and I forgave them.
- I used to sell toys on QVC. I made over 20 appearances and would always tell my family and friends AFTER the fact so they couldn’t watch me. I wore more make-up for those appearances than I did at my own wedding.
- I went on tour with Phish for ten days when I was 22. Duuuuude, it rocked.
- I still feel like a 22-year old just back from Phish tour. Duuuuude, I’m not.
- I became an Ordained Minister in California for one day – May 31st 2008 – in order to officiate the wedding of my friends Jen and Jeff. It was so much fun and one of the biggest honors of my life.
- I really, really want to write a book but I have no idea what to write about. Or how to write a book.
- My primary reason for going to graduate school was so that I’d have a good reason to live in Boulder, CO for another two years. Boulder is my absolute favorite place in the US. I don’t live there because my whole entire family lives in the tri-state area but as soon as everyone is willing to move with me, I’m ready to go back.
- I’m a born and bred Jersey Girl. Bruce. Jovi. AquaNet. Represent.
- My laminated card (you know the one) lists Bradley Cooper, Ryan Reynolds and George Clooney. Although it’s possible that Justin Timberlake has bumped Clooney off. Yeah, I know I’m over 40, shut up. Oh and I have girl crush on Keri Russell.
- My favorite food used to Peanut Butter M&Ms, but now it’s Cadbury Mini Eggs. Not just my favorite CANDY, but my all-time favorite FOOD. You haven’t tried them, have you? Trust me. And my favorite beverages are coffee in the morning and Margaritas. Anytime.
So now you know me.
Who are you? Please share. I love comments as long as they’re not rude, insulting or critical of me in anyway.