Shhh! Klos ur maf.

Standard

This is not a traditional post, but if my goal for this blog is to document occasions that I may otherwise forget, I think some recent “work” done by my boys is worth preserving right here.

First, the Nibbit came home with this masterpiece the other day – an assignment on sequential writing. I’m hoping, based on his spelling, that it’s actually been sitting in his backpack since September but that may be wishful thinking.

OK, take a look (you’ll notice I provided some translation where I thought necessary):

Instructional

I MEAN…

There are so many things wrong with this that I don’t even know where to start!

But I’ll try.

1. The idea that any of my children would write instructional test on “How to Be Quiet” is laughable at best. Also hypocritical and delusional.
2. He’s not even consistent in his butchering of the spelling of “mouth.” First it’s “maf,” then it switches to “malf,” and finally, in the oh-so-critical step 4, it’s back to “maf.”
3. WHAT THE EFF IS A “MAF?!?”
4. Where exactly does he think the fingers go when one says, “Shhh????” Is that an attempt to say “under your malf?” WHO CAN TELL? (Not him. I asked.)
5. And last but most definitely not least, if you actually followed these directions on “How to Be Qwiyit” through to the end, YOU WOULD FAIL. Because he concludes with OPEN YOUR MOUTH. This possibly explains why my house is SO FREAKIN’ NOISY all the time.

I’m not going to lie; I’m a bit worried.

Second, there’s this. This is one of my many “birthday cards” from Happy Dude, who ALWAYS tells it like it is:

HowMuchLove4

#honesty
#ithurtsalittle

2 responses »

  1. Nibbit may not be all that wrong…let’s look. “Qwiyet” makes a lot more sense than “quiet”. There’s a ‘whaa ‘ sound in that word that cannot be derived from ‘qu’. It should be ‘qw’! Maybe the French can get that sound, but this isn’t France. Point for Nibbit. Point 2: he is on to something there. There isn’t anyway you can talk if your fingers (all five) are IN your mouth (or maf). Try it, go ahead!Therefore that is an excellent methodology for being qwiyet. Step 4 is exactly correct. Any exercise – physical or mental- requires a return to the starting point. I believe Nibbit should seriously consider skipping grammar school and start gearing up for the next SAT’s.

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